
Arsenal maestro Andrei Arshavin told arsenal.com today he is not a KGB agent. The rumours come that he was seen meeting with some top Russian KBG agents in a London hotel and was seen doing a James Bond-style execution to a well known Russian assassin in Woodside Park, north of London.
"This is a load of fucking cockshit!" snarled Arshavin "I have nothing to do with the KGB. I didnt kill a servant of the Georgian ambassador in order to access delicate files for the country of beautiful Russia last week. I know nothing about the abduction of an MI6 agent in Surrey last night in order to obtain information. I didnt shoot Alexei Nipkenevo (well known russian assassin) in Woodside Park the other week with Russian ShKAS machine gun with a silencer from 200 feet away. I dont go to training with an ear-piece on and armed with a 10 inch hunting knife and a Kalashnikov in my locker. What a load of fucking bollocks. If anyone says otherwise, we'll have you poisoned while you eat with your families. I mean...errr...this meeting is ajourned."
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