Sol Campbell is "not bumming" Sven-Göran Eriksson

Notts County new boy Sulzeer Jeremiah "Sol" Campbell has told BBC reporters that he is not having sex with Sven-Göran Eriksson, County's current director of football.

"I didnt join County cause i am bumming Sven! Fuck no! I am sucking him off." Campbell said "I like a white willy. He likes black sausage."

County have yet to comment.

Girl, 11, murdered by football

An 11 year old girl was brutally murdered by another 11 year old girl as the Long Beach Indians under 12's took on the Ocean Drive Bananas under 12's last sunday afternoon in Los Angeles.
In this chilling clip the girl in green can be seen deliberately kicking the ball at the girl in white hitting her in the face, killing her instantly.
Two LAPD cops attending the game put two bullets in the head of the offending girl out of disgust. Onlookers then took out guns and a shootout occured. 23 people were killed.

Leeds United encourage fans to take drugs, rape and murder.

Leeds United players turned up to a local primary school in Leeds yesterday morning and told pupils aged 7-12 to take drugs, murder people and rape women.

Pupils at Bridgened Comprehensive were told by star players to commit "unspeakable acts". Team captain Richard Naylor said "all you kids need is a few grams of coke. Snort that right up and beat the living shit out of geezers".

Star striker Jermaine Beckford said "when you see a nice girl in a bar when you get older. Put a roffie in her drink. Bring her to a cheap hotel or an alleyway and have your way with her. Leave her a not then saying 'I hope you were on the pill' and laugh about it".

Manager Simon Grayson said "kill everyone! Next time a classmate gets on your nerves, lodge a pencil in their temple. That'll shut them up".

Leeds United gave an official statement saying "we have to respect the opinions of our players and staff"